I am running a contest to determine the best female ass in the DC area.

When: Submissions accepted from July 10, 2006 to August 1, 2006. Winner announced August 7, 2006.

What: Contestants can submit a picture of their ass or someone else’s ass to dcb @ I will also troll the area for top-notch ass that I see in person. There will be public commenting sessions for asses submitted.

Who: Judges include myself and a select group of men called the assmasters.

Winner: Top ass gets a prize.


  1. Face shot is not required for ass submission.
  2. Ass picture should be work safe.
  3. Your ass should be big for your body shape but not abnormally huge.
  4. Contest open to all races.
  5. Negative points for overhang fat.
  6. If it’s flat, we won’t like that.


  • Too small

  • Too big

  • Nice

  • Very nice

  • Very nice

This is a risky contest to throw in an uptight town, but I’m hoping to get many quality submissions.

41 thoughts on “BEST ASS IN DC CONTEST

  1. KassyK

    HAHAHAHHAA. That is too big. I have a GREAT contender…VK calls her “watermelon booty”…I’ll dope her up-get in a bikini and snap some shots. Money that she wins or at least comes in second.

  2. hedonistic

    Remember, ladies: Sitting with naked booty above the copy machine at work so you can fax it to DCB will probably getcha fired. Believe it or not, there is actually case law on this. You just can’t make some of this sh*t up! :pika:

  3. Anonymous

    The “too small” one is very nice.

    It is all a matter of opinion. Some guys think that is awesome.

  4. tommy

    Now, you have to give respect to the second girl with the Big Ass. It may be huge, but she has a narrow waist! Not many chics can pull that off. She looks like she takes care of herself therefore her great ass is likely genetic and not fat. Thank God for sistas

  5. Peter North

    apparently our boy Roush is running out of jerk-off material to stoop so low…or he is desperately trying to increase his black and latin readership.

    Roush, I dare you to lick the winner’s ass for two (2) hours like your role model the “Butterscotch Stallion”. Don’t disappoint me, ma’man; I know you can do it.

  6. Lonnie Bruner


    Dude, you made a big mistake. You didn’t specify that the submissions must only include FEMALE ass. Now you’re bound to get a whole slew of hairy man-ass pictures. Have fun sorting through them!

  7. virgle kent


    When you first told me about this I thought that?s so crazy it just might fucking work. You are right this town is too uptight for something like this. I predict that you?ll get more responses from ethnic women than your typical white girls. You know those girls if they do have a nice phatty aren?t proud of it. They?re all like ?oh my god Samantha my ass is way too big, I look like one of those rap guys girlfriends or something, do you think I look like J Lo??

    By the way to the earlier commenter Tommy is completely right, some guys aren?t built big enough to handle real phatties.



    I?d enter Ms. Holla 06 but she would win hands down, let?s give other girls a chance to win. But let?s get one thing clear. I?d feel no shame or regret in pimping her ass out to win a prize. Word son!

    let the games begin

  8. Phil

    I am quite confident I have the winner – however, I am negotiating a release of the photo at the moment.

    DCB, is it required that the ass in question be identified?

  9. Anonymous

    Why should an ethnic woman respond, really? He doesn’t care about them, if that hasn’t been crystal clear through just about every post here. All he cares to date are white women, so only white women with big asses should “apply.”

  10. Sudamericana

    Would love to participate, but since I am leaving DC for good tomorrow, I no longer qualify.

    It’ll be strange not to read your blog from Headquarters anymore. However, check for a Buenos Aires and later an Oxford IP, and you’ll be sure to find one… no matter the location, I’m proud to say I’ll still be a DC Bachelor groupie 😥

  11. O-face

    1. Please post all contestants pics…..
    2. I dunno….I’ve seen alot of “White girls” with phat asses roaming our fine city streets. If the obesity epidemic had one positive effect, I’d say it increased certain groups podunk-a-dunks….
    3. If one dude post his pic, I hope he’s dragged into Dupont circle and shot for everybody to see….

  12. Wendy

    “correction: whitish women. Whites, Latinas, and Asians.”

    huh? white but Latina? White but Asian?

    If I had a butt as large as that second pic, I would have to kill myself…because there would be NO clothes that fit…

  13. eltoroverde

    How do I submit myself for consideration as a judge? I have a penchant for the callipygous.

  14. Anonymous

    I’m sure the second picture is photoshopped. Remember Vida’s Ass?

    As for whitish women… all it means is “like” white women – closer to being white.

  15. Wendy

    anon, yeah I know, I was just being bratty because I was grouchy. I am half Latina and people think I am white. I am the example.

    Yeah, the photoshop gig, how can we ever trust again?

  16. hedonistic

    “sigh” I suppose to balance things out, the beautiful men and women of color out there in the DC metro area may send their butt shots to moi, because moi is a fine judge of Teh Booty. :thumbup: I’ll just have to think up a prize . . .

  17. Anonymous

    too small is just right.

    the last two are also very nice, but the first one is sexy.

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