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BROOKE SHIELDS IS JEALOUS

Tom Cruise is a douche, but he gets major props for dating Katie Holmes, no matter what has-been Brooke Shields says.

Shields had a ready tongue, hitting in Cruise?s relationship, by offering him a child ticket so he can take Holmes to see her in hit London musical Chicago. She says: “If he wants to see Chicago, I’ve left him two tickets – one adult, one child.”

Another attempt by older women to bring down their youthful counterparts. Why wouldn’t a guy want to date a girl in her 20’s twenties versus a 45 year old? There are exceptions and some women hold onto their looks into their 30’s, but most don’t. I lost count on how many times I met a hot girl’s mom and wondered if she was adopted. It just fades.

I go to the clubs and see a bunch of 28 year old women who still want to live like they are 20. When I was 22 and going out, I used to feel really insecure after an older woman asked me my age. I’d come up with funny responses so I wouldn’t be placed out the running for a chance with an older, experienced woman. But the past year I realized that the “older, experienced” thing is just another bogus myth I can erase from my head. It seems like the only girls who aren’t corrupted by the nightlife scene and Sex And The City are under 22.

As you get older the only thing you realize that has worth in this life is youth. Hope you didn’t waste yours.

 
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74 Comments »
Marc
10 years, 3 months ago

Yeah, I figure by the time I want to get married I’ll be looking for a woman who is smart, sexy, reasonably mature(that’s a lot to ask for), and right out of college.

Tom Cruise has the right perspective. He’s been getting hot trim since day 1, and now all that original vagina is sagging, time to freshen it up.

He got rid of Nicole at just the right time.

Now if only he would work on ditching that scientology garbage…

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

under 22? You’ve gotta be kidding me DCB. Have fun with your 20 year olds- and have fun hooking up in their parents’ beds. Hope you like listening to Justin Timberlake CDs.

10 years, 3 months ago

Interesting post.

A couple of things:

1. Dating older women is like drinking fine wine, my friend.

2. With that said, there is a time and place for Boone’s Farm.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

You’ll modified these thoughts one day boys when you finally quit thinking mostly with your nuts.

10 years, 3 months ago

“Another attempt by older women to bring down their youthful counterparts.”

I think she was trying to respond in kind to his ungraceful attack on her personal life (involving her use of the antidepressant Paxil while suffering postpartum depression.)

I doubt it has anything to do with jealousy . . . honestly, have you seen the herpes on that girl?

10 years, 3 months ago

Ouch… thankfully I’m still young :) But now I dread growing up even more!

10 years, 3 months ago

How to respond to this post … ew. I think that about sums it up.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

your worst post

Eugenius
10 years, 3 months ago

See…..what all the evil haters dont understand is that when you bone someone younger than 22 it gives you a “fountain of youth” feeling. (Fresh meat, gullable, easily manipulated, you are in control.

Girls that hate on this…are only hating because they are probably older and cannot provide that satisfactory feeling, or simply playing hard to get. We all know young meat loves older guys.

Guys that hate on this…..simply confirm that they never had a chance to try, and have no ability to dip in such a “fountain,” or are just trying to convince themselves that they are picky……riiiight….

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Eugenius… go throw yourself off a cliff. Or better, i hope you contract herpes through all your philandering with college chicks. That is, if youre not actually some loser who sits at home surfing internet porn and never has contact with an actual female. Which, from the tone of your blog, sounds about right.

10 years, 3 months ago

How does a 22 year old act in a club versus a 28 year old? Do they dress diffrently, order different drinks, do old dances like the robot? Who are you right now? I am 30, still go to the club just to dance, that is what I did when I was 15, 21, 25 and still to this day. Please explain this “I go to the clubs and see a bunch of 28 year old women who still want to live like they are 20.” Because now you just sound ignorant. Sure some older women get pissed when they see older men with younger women, but those women have issues, so it’s whack that you think all older women hold a grudge. I am not holding on to my youth, its holding on to me. I get carded everytime, someone thought I was getting my hair done to go to prom, it is not your age, but how you let the world age you. Brooke Shields is just worn.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

DCB,

I’d be surprised if you were getting action from women of any age. I mean…you sport a soul patch and blog about “whores vs. conservative girls”… as if you would know. Why don’t you write about something you really know…like portable blow up dolls.

10 years, 3 months ago

personal attacks tell me that what im observing is at least somewhat accurate.

“I?d be surprised if you were getting action from women of any age. I mean?you sport a soul patch and blog about ?whores vs. conservative girls?? as if you would know.”

Yeah and you come back here every day to read every word I have to say… so whats your point?

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

“is at least somewhat accurate”

-word

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

By far your worst post. Perhaps the salad days of this blog have come and gone. Alas, it was fun while it lasted.

J.P.
10 years, 3 months ago

You girls are ridiculous. I actually date someone older than me and I have absolutely no desire to date someone who is 20. The problem is that some girls feel they can get away with being rude, abusive, or premadonnas ala Sex and the City forever because of their looks. This probably works fine when they are 23, but after 4 or five years of free appletinis and coke they don’t look so hot any more, some other 23 year old is there to replace them, and people don’t feel like putting up with their bad attitude.

As DCB points out- we all age- it’s inevitable. The same can be said of guys actually. Many of the asshole jocks I knew in high school and college now have beer bellies and are losing their hair. They aren’t getting many dates these days and I bet you ladies don’t have much sympathy for them either.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Hahahaha! You guys are f*ing idiots. The same exact thing applies to men. Look at demi moore and ashton kutcher. Not all 40 something year old women will look as good as her, and definitely not all 40 something men will look as good as Tom Cruise, who happens to also be really rich and really famous, which makes anyone more appealling. You guys in your 20somethings will NEVER be that attractive,rich or famous so hold on to your hats, cuz your aging, too, and these young chicks & old won’t give your soon to be pot-belly, balding/and or growing hair where you don’t want it, head expanding( mens heads get fat as they age) with no depth the time of day!

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Good work…not only do i totally agree…i just married a young woman…its perfect

Snoop Shizzout
10 years, 3 months ago

Young bitchez, old bitchez, teenaga n senior citizens, if tha snoop feels tha urge no ID or chizzay bizzay certificate stoppn da bow diznown ta tha bow wow. If tha flizzesh is sizzay n tha mood is R-to-tha-izzles snoop dizzogg plays it tizzight, ya fizzy me?

It dizzay stizzop T-to-tha-izzles tha wheels fall off. Aint no stoppin this shizzit nigga ta help you tap dat ass.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

A disgraceful, disgusting post **

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

DCB – I am your biggest fan but this post was so bad. Go back to making me laugh.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Poppers and Cali are no Spring chickens by this standard. :(

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

If your significant other is really “into you”…I can assure you that he’s not going to throw you over for a 20-year old. That said…”Sex in the City” was a cultural phenomenom that ran for seven years…the subject matter?…confident women in their 30’s (in the case of Kim Cattrell…40’s). I’m in my early 30’s and get hit on by 20-somethings, 30-somethings and some 40-somethings. Aging is not something I think or worry about…too busy having fun and enjoying my life. Girls…the post by DCB is provocative and meant to get a rise out of us…we can’t honestly take this stuff seriously. :)

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

DCB, you really let me down with this one.

nabeel
10 years, 3 months ago

yeah tom cruise may be rich and famous, but he made a baby out of himself on Oprah. I mean, c’mon… a 42 year old flailing about and kneeling on the floor wailing to the heavens “i loooove you katieeeee!” it was sooo funny, yet it looked pathetic for a 40-something man who is supposed to have all his sh*t together

nabeel
10 years, 3 months ago

and by the way, lets see how long tom and katie last

inSOMnia
10 years, 3 months ago

This is funny with all the haters.

10 years, 3 months ago

For the record, Brooke isn’t jealous of shit. Tom publicly berated her for using anti-depressants to treat her post-partum depression, saying she should just take vitamins. The lady is striking back, and right now, he’s a pretty easy target.

Your take on events, however, is just laughable.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Posted earlier and forgot to add:
DCB…you need to get your facts straight about Brooke Shields. She didn’t make remarks regarding Tom Cruise out of jealousy over Katie Holmes. Tom publically criticized Brooke (went on a tirade actually) for her using the anti-depressant Paxil when she was suffering from post-partum depression. She have every right to put that douch in his place. He has gall to judge he actions when is neither a physician or a woman. Enough said.

10 years, 3 months ago

DCB,

10 years, 3 months ago

The churches of Scientology is extending an invitation to you to receive an OCA Personality Test and evaluation free of any charge or obligation.

Your personality has everything to do with your income, your future, your personal relationships, your life and your blog.

A test of this kind would normally cost you $500.00 and up. It is offered to you here free of charge as a public service.

If you are not happy with life, you can find out why.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Sorry…I noticed that I made a number of spelling errors in my previous post. Tom is a “douche” not “douch”…well.. you get the idea.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

DCB, you totally contradict yourself. Katie Holmes is 26, thereby defeating the point.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

A strained, disjointed post. Have you run out of material, DCB?

10 years, 3 months ago

Who made 28 the new 65? Damn, should I start applying for AARP benefits? I’m so out of the loop.

This site is by far the funniest I have ever read. I think I’m hip to the joke. Anyways, I hope there’s a joke you tread such a thin line between genius (I’m keeping my fingers crossed) and making my head explode.

If there is no joke, well, then: Gag. Most of the time, when my (exceptionally hot, ever-aging) girlfriends read this site, they laugh, and laugh, and laugh, and laugh…… and laugh……. and not WITH you.

I get you, man. No one’s really like this, it’s all for your stat counter and comments section. Well played, DCB!

But I think some of your commenters are serious, which is mind-boggling. If they really wanted to plug into a scene consisting of super-dumb, bleached-out twenty year old women with no brain cells, no real sexual experience, no self-esteem, and a closet full of flouncy minis: then they’re heading the right path and I wish them much luck. Keep trading down for the younger ones, you’re right, because lasses like that DON’T age well. But I’d be willing to bet they aren’t any good young either, so you’re screwed in that game.

(And a quick note to all those young women who are just “sooooo glad to be young and cute and stuff OMG!!!1 and not aging yet!” : You will. And, re-read, please. According to DCB+Friends, you’re described as easily manipulated, gullible and being used to make boys like this feel young. And probably comb their soulpatches or something. Us ancients are just old, haggy, bitter beasts. I’d rather be the beast, quite honestly.)

Yours truly,
Appletinis Are Some Foul Shit

10 years, 3 months ago

It’s definitely important to note that of guys over 40, about 99.999% are not attractive even to women of their own age, let alone the 20something golddiggers who might want to use them for their money. You say that *women* go downhill after a certain age? Hahaha. Just wait till you’re 40, you’ll wish you had said nicer things about Brooke ’cause you’ll totally be wanting to date her, and she’ll be all like: No way DCB, you’re all .. 40 … and stuff. Ew.

Lady Jane Grey
10 years, 3 months ago

Lady Jane says: DC Bachelor makes Jungian analysis worthwhile. I *heart* latent misogyny.

LL
10 years, 3 months ago

Context, people:

Brooke Shields was reacting to Tom Cruise’s unwarranted criticsm of her seeking medical treatment for post-partum depression. While she certainly didn’t respond in the most fair, mature fashion she could have (I mean, what does Katie Holmes have to do with it?), it’s kind of understandable that she was pissed. Cruise mouthed off with unsolicited (and uneducated) advice about her, she responded in kind. Brooke wasn’t being vicious to 20-somethings, she was being vicious to Cruise’s “holier-than-thou” attitude.

More context:

If you are a smart, fun, kind person who takes care of him or herself, you’ll be desireable and attractive whether you’re 20, 28, 43, or 60.

If you are ignorant, pretentious, condescending, shallow, and your sense of “personal style” does not extend beyond your outward appearance…then you will be unattractive at any age.

One bad post does not a bad blog make, DCB, but you missed the mark on this one.

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

DCB look how you blew it here. Imagine the response from the horny and intelligent Dating Hell Diarist if you would have posted your desires to date an older woman.

10 years, 3 months ago

Horny and intelligent! Wow, no one’s ever described me in just those words before. Anyways, DCB is too young for me, I think …

An Older Man
10 years, 3 months ago

I must say-the ability of my
gender to avoid reality is one of the most potent
forces in nature. You see it yourself every day – the
balding, pot-bellied, baseball-cap wearing,
Republican-voting man who still, against all reality,
thinks he is irresistable to younger women.

Ladies-be especially aware of any man who listens to music
from the 80’s – he’ll still be thinking that way.
Especially if he’s driving a red pickup truck with
high beams.

Greg
10 years, 3 months ago

You guys are fucking stupid. Does the word “baited” mean anything to you?

Heh
10 years, 3 months ago

Obviously, it means something to you, Greg.

Might I pass you this hook, line, and sinker?

10 years, 3 months ago

Your hater club is going wild. Guess this bothered them for some reason.

Is your hater club filled with 30 year-old females or something? :banana:

Heh
10 years, 3 months ago

Awwwwwwwwwwwww, SNAP!

All you thirtysomething ladies, James just ICED you with that comment!

The clincher, of course, being the dancing banana…

Yakov
10 years, 3 months ago

The banana pwn3d the haters… Speaking of haters, are you all the same person or what? Fuckin’ ridiculous :)

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Women in their 30’s are at the biological sexual peak and always more experienced in all ways than the younger ones you find more physically attractive. Given a choice I would choose a ripened succulent petite apricot like Dating Hell Dairest any day.

10 years, 3 months ago

Man, I’d say shitty post but I haven’t observed the club scene in something like 20 years. But isn’t it always youth obsessed? Isn’t our culture youth obsessed?

And all you Scientology haters out there…be warned it’s all under copyright and you’ll all be sued to the extent of Tom Cruise, Kirstie Alley, Lisa Marie Presley, and John Travolta’s checkbooks! Word to your mother.

Marc
10 years, 3 months ago

A hefty portion of hot sex is directly proportional to how hot you are physically.

It doesn’t take a special breed of woman to ride a cock with skill. Age does not give you an upper hand.

“oh, but I’m 30 plus and I go to the gym!”

And you still look like you were ridden hard, and put away wet.

Down horsey! There are enough desparate men out there for you yet.

Hate on Haters

Spaniard
10 years, 3 months ago

Man, that was a great post. Even though I found myself knee-deep in hate by the time I got to the “Post Comment” area. Most of the hate coming from late 20 to 30 something year old readers.

Try hard to defend yourselves, time is coming for you.

Spaniard
10 years, 3 months ago

Damn Marc, that hurt me, and i’m young.

Hate on Haters

10 years, 3 months ago

“It doesn?t take a special breed of woman to ride a cock with skill.” :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

:thumbup:

Deep Throat
10 years, 3 months ago

Dude WTF do you know about women other than what you see on TV. 15-20-25-50 it don’t matter. If i’m correct from reading your blog, you constantly reference the fact that you go out everynight to come home to bed “lonely” smelling like cigarettes. Bro stop, stick to what you know— Salads and Burgers. Leave the subject of women to the real men of dc. Coochie is Coochie.

10 years, 3 months ago

I think the hardest working man in America James Brown set it straight when he sang:

This is a man’s world, this is a man’s world
But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl

You see, man made the cars to take us over the road
Man made the trains to carry heavy loads
Man made electric light to take us out of the dark
Man made the boat for the water, like Noah made the ark

This is a man’s, a man’s, a man’s world
But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl

Man thinks about a little baby girls and a baby boys
Man makes then happy ’cause man makes them toys
And after man has made everything, everything he can
You know that man makes money to buy from other man

This is a man’s world
But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl

He’s lost in the wilderness
He’s lost in bitterness

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

DCB I’m starting to worry about you. Please check out blogger BossMack right away for sage wisdom.

10 years, 3 months ago

Dig deep.

Johnny5
10 years, 3 months ago

I can’t help but laugh at all the anonymous haters who take this personally and jump to the defense of someone they don’t even know.

“Tom Cruise is a douche”

^^ Did you all miss this part?

Keep up the good work man.

Mortis
10 years, 3 months ago

Haha, what the hell happened here? So, I’m scanning all the useless hating looking for comments by real people and BAM, out of no where, Marc is talking about riding old women hard and putting them away wet. Good stuff. HAHA!

When did all these people come out the woodwork? They see mto belittle you, and yet they also seem to be genuinely insulted by the man they seem to look down upon. Huh.

Marc
10 years, 3 months ago

Only someone who can’t lay the type of women he’s really attracted to would say, “Coochie is Coochie”.

10 years, 3 months ago

have you ever heard a man say the word coochie? i haven’t. that poster is definitely a 34 year old cat lady

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

An slang word (coochie) one doesn’t hear much anymore, I doubt that was 34 year old woman.

The gypsy woman told my mother
Before I was born
I got a boy child’s comin’
He’s gonna be a son of a gun
He gonna make pretty women’s
Jump and shout
Then the world wanna know
What this all about
But you know I’m him
Everybody knows I’m him
Well you know I’m the hoochie coochie man
Everybody knows I’m him

I got a black cat bone
I got a mojo too
I got the Johnny Concheroo
I’m gonna mess with you
I’m gonna make you girls
Lead me by my hand
Then the world will know
The hoochie coochie man
But you know I’m him
Everybody knows I’m him
Oh you know I’m the hoochie coochie man
Everybody knows I’m him

On the seventh hours
On the seventh day
On the seventh month
The seven doctors say
He was born for good luck
And that you’ll see
I got seven hundred dollars
Don’t you mess with me
But you know I’m him
Everybody knows I’m him
Well you know I’m the hoochie coochie man
Everybody knows I’m him

Muddy Waters

Anonymous
10 years, 3 months ago

Actually…I can’t imagine any woman referring to her stuff as “my coochie”. That’s like saying “my beaver”…definately a term only a man would use.

Aja
10 years, 3 months ago

“cooter”,, hahha, that’s funnier

Anonymous
10 years ago

you will get old too. and, it is all in how much you want to hold onto your looks. do you think jennifer anniston is hot? how about raquel welch. Yet – look at brad pitt. not aging as well. look at a man at 20-30-40. many look pretty bad after the beers and wings that contributed to their 20/30s. when you are in your late 30’s, i want to reread your blog. perhaps the tone will change. and tom and katie – short-lived my man. they are just loving the sex right now.

Anonymous
10 years ago

you will get old too. and, it is all in how much you want to hold onto your looks. do you think jennifer anniston is hot? how about raquel welch. Yet – look at brad pitt. not aging as well. look at a man at 20-30-40. many look pretty bad after the beers and wings that contributed to their 20/30s. when you are in your late 30’s, i want to reread your blog. perhaps the tone will change. and tom and katie – short-lived my man. they are just loving the sex right now.

Nica110
9 years, 11 months ago

What wouldn’t want a much younger women? There ARE guys out there who don’t. They are called “secure, quality guys”. Anyway Tom probably wasn’t PREFERRING a much younger woman, he just ended up finding one.

WHO CARES if a 28-year old woman lives like she’s 20?! What the h— is the difference between 28 and 20 anyway? Who cares even if a 45 year-old woman lives like a 20-year old? You act as if there is some law or set of rules we don’t know about! And as for a lot of women losing their looks, well a lot don’t, too. Brooke Shields is 40 and still beautiful. I am 44 and still look good. Ever wonder why women don’t ususally want younger men, even though they may look better? Becuase they don’t have what they need emotionally, mentally, among other things! Men are just more immature. However, YOU, are clearly one of the most immature “men” I have ever seen. Plus chauvanistic, and stupid. Everything about you turns me off, and makes me want to vomit. And I’d feel that way about you at ANY age.

Nica110
9 years, 11 months ago

As for Eugenius… I am 44 years old and have never in my entire life liked older guys, except for a couple years older. You have no idea what you are talking about.
Plus,the only reason some of you guys get satisfaction from “manipulating” and “being in cotrol” of younger women, is because you are SUPER insecure, and are threatened by experience – you know you will be “judged”, and can’t handle it. Secure men PREFER more experienced women. Guys like you are the type I wouldn’t even say hello to.

Nica110
9 years, 11 months ago

And to Aja: “Brooke Shields is just worn”. Have you SEEN her??!! If that’s worn, then we should all look half as “worn”!! I’ll bet she looks ten times better than you do!!

Nica110
9 years, 11 months ago

As for MARC: you’re the type I would hate at any age and for every reason. You are probably super ugly and you are definitely VOMIT material, not to mention clearly a spineless wimp. “No Satisfaction” is clearly your middle name, and I’m quite sure that if I talked to those young girls you supposedly have sex with, they would have really uncomplimentary things to say about you and your performance. Oh, I just love idiots like you; there’s so much you don’t know and will begin to wonder about.

Nica110
9 years, 11 months ago

All you idiots who say that the hate comments are coming from late 20’s -30 year olds, get this: I would hate you and tell you so at any age. At age 18 I hated insecure, wimpy, chauvanistic yet spineless men like you. That describes each idiot here who said something about “mad older women writing the posts”. Do you have anything intelligent to say? Obviously not. Ever read a book in your life? Already know the answer to that one.

9 years, 11 months ago

Why not? Women live longer then men so it can be a perfect relationship, “and they died on the same day” like in a fairy-tale :-)

Tina
9 years, 6 months ago

Does anybody ever think about the time Brooke Shields and Michael Jackson were an “item?” What a laugh!

8 years, 4 months ago

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8 years, 1 month ago

mysteryman…

this book is awsome i recommend it to everybody the show is coming out aug 1…