Yesterday, a man that I’ve never dated dumped me.

He informed me that since I had not been paying enough attention to his advances that he was “bumping” me from his address book’s “A-list” to its lowly “B-list.”

Then, he proceeded to inform me that had I responded to his latest emails, texts and phone calls, he would have flown me to New Orleans (on his company’s jet) for some Mardi Gras Ball that is supposedly something special (at least to people on his Sanyo A-list).

Oh — but it gets freakier …

After that, he told me that he found someone to take my place at the masquerade. A blonde model. Ha! What’s up with that? I was thinking: “Geesh! Take a hint, buddy. And please – give me a parachute and let me jump to C-level!”

But I didn’t say that because he got all sobby and said, “what we had just wasn’t working out for me.” Uhh … what did we have? Other than my full inbox and his pleas for dates?

I ended up giving him the “friend speech.”

QUESTION: Is it possible to get dumped by someone you’ve never pumped?

12 thoughts on “BUMPED AND DUMPED

  1. smash

    This very thing happened to me a few months back–only I never even spoke to the guy. He got my number from a friend, I determined he was a freak from his first voicemail, he called me everyday for over a month, and the last call was all about how I ruined everything and how upset I should be about it.

    I think what these guys have in common is that they are so insecure, that they are secure in their insecurity.

  2. Matt

    “and by the way, if you?re not interested in him? then I don?t see what?s the problem here?”

    The fact that he was being an immature douche about it. Did you read the part where he told her that he’s taking a model to Mardi Gras?

  3. o-face

    Yeah, I’m dumping you too. I know we haven’t met either but thats such a silly barrier to a relationship. I’ve decided to downgrade your status to 3rd team. Sorry, I had to do this on a comment board, but your stong, keep your head up.

  4. Miss Metropolis Post author

    Just thought it was bizarre.

    We did not have a relationship … other than in his head … and he dumped me.

    I mean, I am glad he got closure on our non-existant relationship and all, and is moving on, but …


  5. DCB

    “QUESTION: Is it possible to get dumped by someone you?ve never pumped?”

    Though in this case the guy isn’t really dumping you. This is his last-ditch effort to make you want to go out with him. A real, sincere dump is when you just stop answering your phone or returning calls.

  6. Miss Metropolis Post author

    Ha … he was trying to make me jealous with the model-jet-ball talk?

    Man. Guys are confusing.

    So — in other words … he is looking for a gold-digger because he doesn’t have anything else to offer?

    I bow to the all-knowing DCB. :bow:

  7. NOLAinDC

    Oh please. If he’s flying down on a corporate jet to a ball, it’s one that anyone can buy a ticket to, and is basically a BYOB party (with admittedly great entertainment) in an airplane hangar. Any ball worth going to is super-exclusive, so you’re not missing anything. Especially if your date would have been a jackass.

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