Category: Girls

SERIOUSLY

One of the most useful skills a player can have is the ability to screen for a woman who wants sex. You can have the best game in the world but if you are investing energy into the wrong person then you will walk away disappointed. I’ve lost count of how many times I have spent hours on a girl only to find out she has intimacy issues. If within the first five minutes you can’t determine if she will have sex with you tonight, then it’s time to develop a better screening strategy.

I have a two-level screen process when it comes to meeting girls. The first is a compatibility screen. Simply think of all the girls that have ever seriously liked you and note down the physical and personality traits they possess. There is a pattern. It is easier to bed women who you share a natural chemistry with, but keep in mind that it is possible to manufacture chemistry for a short period of time with a girl you are normally incompatible with.

The intimacy screen is much more important. There is just one question you need to ask yourself: Is she serious about fucking? Here you need to think of all the girls who you have had sex with quickly and the traits that they put out. Again, there will be a pattern. Some of it is obvious: a girl who is outgoing and drinking alcohol is more likely to have sex with you than a shy girl who doesn’t drink. Sometimes it comes down to a certain vibe, and depending on your look it could even be a certain country that she is from.

If you are a guy who likes to get sex with the minimal amount of effort, you need to constantly reevaluate the pick-up as it is happening, asking yourself if she is serious about fucking you. This is the number one way to maximum the use of your time in a bar or club. Say no to wasting time on girls who aren’t serious about fucking, unless you are at the club to look for something more.

Do not confuse a girl who is serious about fucking with a girl who is a slut. I know girls who do not have many guy notches, but they have tons of sex because they find one guy they like and hold onto him for a long time. I also know girls who have slept with tons of guys, but their activity comes in spurts and they do it more because they need attention instead of because they just met an interesting guy. A girl who is serious about fucking will have sex with a guy she is very interested in, and won’t make you wait two months or some other arbitrary time that is longer than necessary.

Experience will be your guide in determining whether a girl is serious about fucking or not, but I have happened upon a few observations that can help in your determination.

1. Physical proximity. After attraction has been established, does she mind if you enter her physical space? Does she mind if you rest your hand on her hip? Does she mind if you rest your hand on her ass? If she does, she is not serious about fucking.

2. Dance floor. While dancing does she mind if you stick your crotch on her ass? Does she mind if you get a massive hard-on? If she does, she is not serious about fucking.

3. The kiss. Two hours. That is the longest it should take for a make-out. If she pulls back to block a possible kiss attempt when you get your head a little close, she is not serious about fucking.

4. The hand-hold. After dancing and maybe even kissing, there will be a time where you move to a different part of the club. Put out your hand. If she doesn’t grab it with a semi-firm grip, she is not serious about fucking.

5. Friend ditch. If she constantly needs to check on her friends and is scared of losing them, she is not serious about fucking.

Sometimes a girl passes every test but logistics make it impossible to seal the deal. Or maybe she really is serious about fucking you but she can’t do it until the first date because of some rule she just can’t break. Use proper judgment on whether it is worth it for you to proceed or not.

Now I’m sure many guys reading are thinking something like, “Wait, I met this girl and I got her number and after a couple dates we had sex.” That’s something I’ve done too and it’s definitely one way of getting sex, but it involves more work than many men are willing to put in. If you are trying to spend money and take girls out on dinner dates, I think you are looking for girls who are serious about dating instead of serious about fucking.

I DONT WANT TO HEAR YOUR PRIVATE CONVERSATION

Next time you are near two girls, pay attention to their loud conversation for one minute. Nine times out of ten they are talking about guys, analyzing every minutiae of every encounter and every conversation. Instead of looking at the big picture between men and women and doing something useful with it (like entertaining thousands of people through a blog), girls just zero in on some stupid situation and beat it to death, asking their very inexperienced friends for advice on how to live life.

I could care less what girls talk about, but when I’m sitting in the bookstore reading The 33 Strategies of War, the last thing I need is to hear how Chad didn’t call you when he said he would, or how Thaddeus got you a non-romantic gift for your birthday. The only time sitting next to two girls in a bookstore or coffeeshop is tolerable is when they are speaking a foreign language.

Guys sometimes talk about girls to brag or discuss tactics. :hump:
Girls always talk about guys to analyze, whine, complain, cry, and seek validation. :boring:

TRAITS OF A BETA MALE

– Scared of his own desires
– Does not like his reflection in the mirror.
– Unable to go after what he wants.
– Passive in bed.
– Waits for permission.
– Pushover.
– Looks for the nearest TV when you say the word “game.”
– Does not like to lead. Follower.
– Seeks identity in his career and not his masculinity.
– Afraid of taking risks.
– Qualifies his weaknesses.
– Worries about a girls’s pleasure before his own.
– Loves eating a girl out.
– Not a real man.

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DOES SHE COME BACK?

Another night, another club, another girl. It’s going well with this one but you feel like you are doing all the work. She has a big group of friends she keeps talking to and it seems like if you don’t keep re-initiating conversation, the pick-up is over. Finally you decide to do a test: hang around but do not restart the conversation. Does she come to you? In this case she doesn’t. She doesn’t even look your way.

In this type of situation you can either leave, float around her general vicinity, or barrel through until you get a 100% clear sign she isn’t interested. But it’s easy to dismiss disinterest as something else. Maybe she is the type of girl who is shy around guys. Maybe she’s just playing hard-to-get. “Oh, she really wants it.”

There are three main degrees of interest a girl can have in you. The first is no interest. You don’t waste your time with these, and even if you wanted to, she wouldn’t give you the time of day. The second is lukewarm interest. She could like you, but she has to “get to know” you. This could take time, and may or may not be worth it depending on the girl. The third is instant interest. She saw you, and within two seconds she was attracted to you. There is something about your look or vibe that got her attention quickly.

There was a time when I would have pushed until I was absolutely certain it wasn’t going anywhere. But now do I really want to put in energy to pursue mediocre, aloof club girls? What exactly is my return on investment? Many players don’t think like this. They are machines, going after every opportunity, unrelenting. They have the shotgun approach.

The shotgun player does not care if a girl is showing interest or not; he’s going to fire and see what he hits. The second type of player has the kitchen sink approach. He has built a one-of-a-kind sink through years of experience and patiently waits for something to fall through the drain. The shotgun player gets more women, but he puts in the most amount of work and energy. He doesn’t make it look that easy. The kitchen sink player gets much less women, but he puts in very little energy.

It doesn’t matter to the shotgun player if the girl comes back or not. He will go back in and push until the girl turns her back to him. But the kitchen sink player does care. His whole system relies on screening out girls who are not willing to invest energy into him. He knows that if she does come back, he’s going to have a much easier time getting what he wants from her because she is willing to put in much of the work it takes to get her in bed.

I think men owe it to themselves to try both ways of playing the game. Each man’s personality is probably geared towards one method, and you won’t know unless you commit to both of them. From my experience, the shotgun approach is much more exciting. Your phone is blowing up with numbers, you are going out on a lot of dates, and you get more sexual variety. But it’s tiring. You are putting your lifeblood into girls you end up not liking. Kitchen sink approach is irregular and slow, but ultimately more satisfying. The emotional connection is greater because she is investing as much energy into you as you are to her. There’s more reciprocation.

In the end it comes down to how badly you want to get laid tonight. If you don’t care then you can afford to wait around until a girl bites. Otherwise, it’s going to be a long night.

HAVING FUN

When you’re young, everyone tells you not to settle down right away, and to date around, and “have fun”. People who are older and married (usually your family) will tell you this because they are wistful that they got married at 21 and have now been divorced at least once because they really, probably, weren’t ready to get married at that age. They think everyone should stay single until the age of 30. On the other side of the coin, older women who have never been married (it’s always women) – the “spinster” – who is still single and repellent to men will tell you to “have fun” not realizing that everyone laughs at her behind her back for still acting like she is 23 and prowling on younger men.

But the problem is that one day in the not-so-distant future, if you continue on this fun-having trajectory, you will wake up 35 and unmarried, still “having fun” but probably with several missed chances at love and maybe marriage because you “didn’t want to be tied down” or you “weren’t ready”. But at 35, you won’t be nearly as pretty or cute, and you’ll be reduced to dating sleazy 65 year old men with two marriages under their belt. When is anyone ever ready for anything? It’s best to keep your sails clean, so to speak, and be prepared.

Really, I don’t understand why people emphasize the need to “have fun” so much. You know what I think is fun? Drinking bloody marys and eating Haagen Dazs ice cream all day and watching “Pride and Prejudice” on repeat. But you know why I don’t do that? Because I have to work, and because having that kind of fun will probably make me fat and sick and be completely unproductive. It’s an excellent analogy for what “having fun” in the dating world will get you.

STATUS

Men are able to use both personality and status to get women. The personality man uses words, attitude, and body language. The status man uses clothing, job title, and cars. It’s easy to imagine a line with personality on one end and status on the other, where a majority of men fit somewhere in between.

I use about 85% personality because it is the best way for me to attract the kind of girl that I like. I dress in simple, dated clothing. I drive an old, practical car. I don’t put too much time into my appearance. I am reluctant to talk about my job. I am slow to reveal interesting things I do that may impress women. My game highlights my humor and energy instead of my material possessions. It pays off: I date girls who are low-maintenance, laid-back, creative, and spontaneous.

My job title used to be a humble one. It said I’m neither poor nor rich. Because I don’t attract girls who are looking for status, it was never a problem when I told these girls I need to watch my spending.

But now I have a new job title that is much more flashy. For the past two weeks I have a stronger answer to do the inevitable “What do you do” question. Girls now ask more about my job than they did before, maybe trying to piece together how much I really make. It completely changes the vibe of the encounter where my career achievement gets the spotlight instead of my sexy banter.

The worst thing a guy can do is use his money to attract a girl. Using status does get your foot in the door but it has two large drawbacks: (1) it prevents you from building a proper foundation to consistently get and keep girls, and (2) it attracts the wrong type of girl.

In The Prince, Machiavelli talks about the two ways to gain power: ability and good fortune. Princes who use ability have a hard time establishing their rule, but an easy time keeping it. Princes who rise through good fortune have an easy time establishing their rule, but a hard time holding on. Ability allows you to meet future challenges and adapt to the constantly changing environment, characteristics needed to successfully rule a nation.

Because […] he who has not first laid his foundations may be able with great ability to lay them afterwards, but they will be laid with trouble to the architect and danger to the building.

When you get girls through money, you are using good fortune. You will land some easy bait, but you have used a lure that many other men have. Not only is your hold on the woman tenuous, but your ability to get other women depends on external factors such as your bank account. What happens when the status man goes through a rough spot? His real power is weak, and he is under constant pressure to maintain the image of success even when his financial house is in disorder.

As a club veteran, I see the types of girls that give second looks to sharply dressed men in VIP booths. If you walk down the ghetto while waving hundred dollar bills in your hand, I doubt you will be surprised when someone robs you of it. Money attracts people who like money. Status attracts women who want this money; the shallow kind of woman that still has trouble searching for a deeper meaning in life besides collecting overpriced purses.

Using personality (“game”) to get women allows you to weather any storm. It doesn’t matter if you live with your parents, work at Starbucks, or dress in Old Navy clothing because as long as you have the ability to engage women emotionally and push those attraction buttons, almost any woman can be yours. Broke or not, the only thing that would stop you from meeting that hot girl in the dairy section of the supermarket is yourself, not your wallet.

I went back to telling girls my old job title. Modest, simple… just like the girl I want.

BAD GAME HABIT

A good way to get a girl out of the club is to get something to eat. It’s harmless and safe. I’ve been doing this for years without really thinking about if it leads to the bang or not.

It really doesn’t. A night of drinking mixed with food makes girls really tired. I feel like I can actually see it when the pizza grease hits her bloodstream. New rule: never, ever use food to venue change. Go straight from club to bedroom, very casual-like. Save your money.