I did some thinking and I believe now is the time to let it go. There is nothing more to accomplish and people have been complaining for several months now.

Yes, I am retiring my funny t-shirts.

Goodbye funny Jesus shirt…

Goodbye funny virgin shirt…

Goodbye Care Bear shirt that got me many delicious hugs…

And goodbye morning wood shirt; I will remember all the conversations you ignited..

I’m too old for the funny t-shirt, no matter how awesome they may be. Time for me to blend in with the masses and realize that I am not special or unique. I will be going to Hecht’s to buy a pair of Dockers Khakis ASAP.

23 thoughts on “GOODBYE

  1. Liz

    Aw, that sucks. But if you’ve grown too old for them, then don’t wear them. I’d suggest maybe giving them away to Goodwill or something?

    I have gotten a lot of funny shirts from T-Shirt Hell. One of my faves was my “Sharing is Caring–Fuck the RIAA” shirt.

  2. dcdramagrrls

    Ahh.. you are never too old for the funny T-shirts. Think of all the smiles you give others! I met my current Boy while he was wearing a, “I date ugly chicks” t-shirt. I remember thinking, this poor guys got no game at all – but, it worked for me.

  3. holiday

    I can’t wear t-shirts like that any more either. I realized as I wore my “Free Martha” shirt on the eve of her release from prison. All of my friends stopped me and asked, “You aren’t really wearing that t-shirt in public are you?”

  4. DCB Post author

    SVM: I like his shoes. Sure I can use those but then I will buy it and realize I need something else to “go with it”. Fashion is such a money black hole.

  5. Jean-Marc

    SVM and DCB: Well… the story of this shirt is something like this:

    Ellen (the gay friend): “You should wear that shirt when we go out! It would be funny! How about that?”

    Jean-Marc: “I don’t think so”

    Ellen: “Please!”

    Jean-Marc: “I think not”

    Ellen: “What if I buy it for you as a gift! You’ll have no choice!”

    Jean-Marc: “Not convinced”

    Ellen: “I’ll buy you beer!”

    Jean-Marc: “Done deal”

  6. Otown

    Dear Ann Landers,

    you have got to be kidding me, I am about your age I think. and if you really mean your last post, i just updated my wardrobe to look more leisurely and less professional.

    I sport tees like these, cool jeans, and steve maddens. guess what, 18-20 year olds have been giving me the eye nonstop.

    get out of your funk, and don’t let other peoples complaints influence your thinking. I got the feeling from a majority of your posts that you were a bit more of an independent thinker then a sheeple.

    besides if it makes you think or laugh ? or even get angry ? it’s served its purpose.

    Related quotes dump

    “To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.” Elbert Hubbard

    “Once you become predictable, no one’s interested anymore.” Chet Atkins

    “Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death.” James F. Bymes

    “An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy to be called an idea at all.” Elbert Hubbard

    “The man who is always worrying about whether or not his soul would be damned generally has a soul that isn’t worth a damn.” Oliver Wendell Holmes

    “In the United States, the majority undertakes to supply a multitude of ready-made opinions for the use of individuals, who are thus relieved from the necessity of forming opinions of their own.”
    Alexis de Tocqueville

    “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.” Elbert Hubbard

    “A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.” Christopher Morley

    I could post more, but I am tired… to think you once ispired me to get off my rump and chase tail and be free. The second you care too much what other people think of you they will control you.

    end transmission!

  7. Anonymous

    Hey DCB,

    I have thoroughly enjoyed each of your posts. Please consider my advice: get a master/PHD in social/personal psychology and become a writer. Not only will you do what you love for a living, you’ll have a chance to make a huge contribution for the better of our society.

  8. SVM

    Noooooooo … for the love of God, just, whatever you do, do not get a Ph.D.! Do get a book contract though … I think you’d be a shoe-in.

  9. Dave

    i was wondering where you found the care bear shirt that said 100% huggable on it, ive been searching for ages and i cant seem to find one. If you can give me any tips on where to find one i would really appreciate it, thanks.


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