HOUSING CRUNCH II

If people are willing to live in a laundry room, I wondered what else they would live in. So I took the troll a step further with this ad:

$60 – Large walk-in closet for rent

We are 4 professionals (2 girls and 2 guys) living in a very spacious house. We have a huge walk-in closet downstairs outside living areas that is being used for storage. You can fit a twin bed in there and probably a small nightstand. We can power your closet with some extension cord.

You are free to use the living room to hang out, where we have a large television with cable. This space is best for someone who doesn’t stay at home much, and literally just needs a bed to crash. We have two very nice cats, but they will not bother you if you close your closet door. We did some tests with a metal bar so you can definitely “lock” your door for full privacy. Obviously there is limited storage space.

You will share a bathroom with 3 other people. Utilities are included. Fifteen minute walking distance to Grosvenor metro, safe neighborhood, plenty of street parking.

Unfortunately for society, I got more responses than for the laundry room. I saved the best one for last.

1. hi i was wondering if this was still available. if you can could you please email me pics of it or email me more info i really need somewhere. thanks!

2. I was born in oklahoma, but i was brougth up in Spain. I moved to spain 20years ago after the death of my father… [complete life history]… I am sincerely interested in the room as advertised and i will aslo like to ask some question about the room.

3. I’m very interested in renting your closet, but am curious as to what the full arrangement would be. (And curious about whether or not this is for real) First, I would have access to the living room, but would I also have access to the kitchen? Or is it just the living room/closet? Are you guys requesting a security deposit? As for me… I’m 24, and looking for a place to stay for a while until I find an apartment. I’m quiet, and I work three days a week from 9 to 4, and am in school from 9 to 9 on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I’m quiet, adore cats, and neat.

4. I’ve read your adv. Interested. As I don’t stay much at home, just need a bed. I need to go daily to gaithersburg, so you location is also convenient. (this guy also asked emailed about the laundry room)

5. If this is ok, let me know when I could come to see it etc. (works at NIH… government salary not enough these days)

6. Hello How are you, well believe it or not this is just perfect for me, I am a 25 year old professional, I work at a law firm downtown, and I am in school. Currently I am working on several business projects, ( so I can be rich : ) ) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am currently moving from where I live now, in hopes of saving money for my endeavors. I am honest, clean, and have a wonderful personality. I also clean houses on the side, and I am a good cook!! Please e-mail me back with more details. (this girl also emailed about the laundry room)

7. I’m not too big on walk-in closets but I was wondering if I could live in your bathroom instead. Any chance I can get a stove in there?

8. I need a place to store 80 kilos of marijuana. I’ll pay you the $60 per month plus all you can smoke. I don’t shower much.

9. Please give me a call at ***. Im a student at a nursing school, single non smoker nor drinker and very much interested in living over there. Give me ur
number or address so I can reach you . Take care

10. Your place sounds great- close to my work and affordable. Email me back if you are interested. Thanks

11. Can we set up a time and date so I can look at it.

12. I am a teacher with good habits and am a non-smoker. I am interested in renting your room if still available. I work in the D.C. area 4 days a week and commute home to NY for the weekends. If all works out, I would be able to move in asap.

I’m really concerned about the two individuals who responded to both the closet and laundry room ads. Imagine how bad it must be for them, sifting through Craigslist and getting all excited when they find barely livable space.

The best email is from a military man…

My name is *** and i am a member of *military branch*. This is no kidding, exactly what I need, I’m never home cause i have a house in WV that I bought in Aug. I don’t have any furniture here, i just rent a room. I’d like to come by and take a look and possibly offer you guys a hundred dollars a month if your serious. This is exactly what I have been searching for. I have a small bed already and would love to do this. Please let me know if this is still available.

PS I’m not weird, I’m very nomal and would love to meet ya!

He follows up with another email!

Wanted to include a picture of myself to see if you thought i was closet worthy,

Thanks for your time and I really hope this works out.

He included a picture of him with a very attractive young woman. I feel bad for him because he is obviously very into the closet, but if it’s any consolation for him he would have definitely got it.

One of my friends recently posted an ad for his room in the Maryland suburbs. He posted it twice. Responses… 4. As for my two post response tally for meager living conditions: 21+ and counting.

Postscript 2/17/06: I’ve received an additional eight responses to the closet space, including one person who emailed me a third time, begging for a response…

I swear this is the last email. I wont bother you guys anymore. I am just VERY VERY interested in renting this room. PLease let me know if you guys rented.

The funny military man also did not want to give up…

Well, if he turns up the offer let me know, that would have rocked! Of Course, everymorning I would have felt like I was, “coming out of the closet”. Thanks for the reply and seriously let me know if it can ever workout.

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