Many of you know that Scientologist Isaac Hays quit South Park two weeks ago, claiming he got sick of the show’s religious “intolerance.” It was obvious he left because of the Scientology episode, where Tom Cruise, John Travolta, and R. Kelly lock themselves in the closet and refuse to come out. During the episode we learn of actual Scientologist beliefs, such as how Xenu the alien overlord sent aliens to die on planet Earth, collecting their souls with a soul catcher to later inhabit humans. This happens while the tagline “THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE” remains on the screen.

The show’s creators dealt two stages of severe Isaac Hays ownage. The first:

This is 100 percent having to do with his faith of Scientology… He has no problem _ and he’s cashed plenty of checks _ with our show making fun of Christians.

…never heard a peep out of Isaac in any way until we did Scientology. He wants a different standard for religions other than his own, and to me, that is where intolerance and bigotry begin.

The next was last week’s South Park episode (torrent). Chef joins the “Super Adventure Club,” which brainwashes him into a pedophile. Using voice bits from previous episodes, the creators have Chef saying he wants to make sweet love to children. He dies a most gruesome death in the end by a mountain lion and grizzly bear.

Ownage Runners-Up:

1. A Chinese man blogged about how he doesn’t want to live in a society where he can’t express himself. He ends his post with “But wait, would that land me in prison?” He was jailed five days later, and is still imprisoned. (Via Washington Monthly).

2. Barzelay Google search.

21 thoughts on “OWNAGE OF THE WEEK

  1. Corncob

    Great punchline.

    I’d feel a little bit sorry for the guy, but remembered a quote from the comments regarding David: “You [David Barzelay] seemed like an okay guy when I met you sober at lucky bar, but i?m still shocked at what i saw last night. I doubt you would act that way around your family or coworkers, so dont act like that around adult professionals.” from this thread: http://dcbachelor.com/2006/david-barzelay-is-an-idiot

  2. Barzelay's Future Employer


    As technology progresses, and people become more and more reliant on the internet, these google searches can do no good.

  3. O-face

    Only problem with this post, is that Isaac Hayes is in a fucking hospital, unable to move after having a serious stroke. South Park doesn’t even know where the announcement came from. I think this can be chalked up to the Scientology freaks, who probably released this inorder to damage the show even more. Word on the street is that Tom Cruise had major pull and got the episodes pulled from Televison.

    I want to be your Pat O’Brien for this blog so I can say sh** like him: ie–“Lets hang out and do some fucking coke baby, fuck, and do some more.”

  4. Angry Dwarf!

    K…I know I’m a bit late and this is kinda off topic…but I had to say my piece…I just went to the DCist blog…I know…I know…why would I do something dumbassish like that…but I just had to be reminded why I hate that site so much…3 entries put the reasons why this blog sucks so much ass back in my mind…

    1. Entry about how bad MD drivers are…who cares!…and noted this was from the Washington Times…which spews so much crap it might as well be a sewage tretment plant
    2. Entry about Geroge Mason making the Final 4…ummm…did someone need to blog bout this as if nobody knew?
    3. Entry about a bar crawl in B-more thats theme is you to dress up as a pirate…my god 1st who came up with that idea and got people thinking its a good idea…and 2nd…this event takes place in BALTIMORE…isnt this the DC-ist blog?
    4. Yea I know I only said 3 entries but I found another one…a recap of recent entries with a this pic…http://www.dcist.com/attachments/dcist_martin/GMU%20Victory.JPG wow for the love that is holy…i got nothing else.

    Thanks for letting me rant!!!

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