Size Large

For the first shirt I decided to go with a statement that guides much of my existence. I wear this shirt with pride.

You can get one at DCBStore.com.


The shirts will shrink considerably (about an inch by both length and width) after a machine dry. If you get the shirt and you are satisfied with the size, do not put it in the dryer. Air dry it instead. Also, do not iron the lettering.

What size should I pick?

If you aren’t above 6 feet tall, I probably wouldn’t get Large because of the length. I’m 6’1 and I lean towards a size medium (undried) because it is more fitted, though slightly too fitted because I have big muscles. Medium is probably going to be the best bet for average sized guys. I can pull off a large after shrinking it through machine drying (strangely, the large shrunk down the most after its third drying, making it very similar to an undried medium). American Apparel may have updated their sizing, so their shirt sizing seems to be similar to Hanes or Fruit of the Loom. You can always exchange the shirt for a different size by sending it back. Returns are okay too.

Can I trust you with my credit card number?

All transactions are secure and your credit card info goes directly from the store to my credit card processor. I never see it. I have done test transactions with my own credit card and everything comes up kosher. Your statement will show “DCB STORE.” Paypal is also a payment option if you are paranoid.

How long will it take to get the shirt?

About a week from when you order (via USPS unless you choose UPS), but so you don’t hold that against me I will officially state two weeks. It will come in a poly mailer.

Why do I have to register?

Because of the software. I’m using Zen Cart and right now they do not allow the option of taking off registration. It had all the other features I needed so this was a compromise. As the privacy policy states, your info is kept private. Your credit card information is not stored.

Will you put this on womens cut shirts?

I’m thinking about it.

Will you print more if these sell out?

Most likely. I want to keep quantities low so I don’t have to maintain inventory.

What kind of reactions will I get from wearing this shirt?

In public places no one is going to say anything to you, but you will notice people looking. In bars or clubs people will do double takes and make comments. Most are in the vein of “Hah that’s funny/great.” Some people don’t even notice. Some girls say things like, “Oh I see.” I think it would be boring if you really tell people what the shirt means, so I just say that pump and dump refers to the stock market. I’m also going to try to say it’s about working out at the gym.

Will wearing this shirt increase or decrease my game?

That would be like asking, “Should I have long hair or short hair?” I’m confident I can wear a shirt that says “I’m gay” and still pull.

The first night I wore the shirt I spent a lot of time with a petite blond whose eye level was at the shirt’s text the entire time. The girls that want to bang won’t care what shirt you are wearing.

Can you ship to Canada or somewhere else?

Most likely. Email me and I will get you a quote.

More pics:

European male model (wearing size medium)

Store link: DCBstore.com.