Size Large

For the first shirt I decided to go with a statement that guides much of my existence. I wear this shirt with pride.

You can get one at DCBStore.com.


The shirts will shrink considerably (about an inch by both length and width) after a machine dry. If you get the shirt and you are satisfied with the size, do not put it in the dryer. Air dry it instead. Also, do not iron the lettering.

What size should I pick?

If you aren’t above 6 feet tall, I probably wouldn’t get Large because of the length. I’m 6’1 and I lean towards a size medium (undried) because it is more fitted, though slightly too fitted because I have big muscles. Medium is probably going to be the best bet for average sized guys. I can pull off a large after shrinking it through machine drying (strangely, the large shrunk down the most after its third drying, making it very similar to an undried medium). American Apparel may have updated their sizing, so their shirt sizing seems to be similar to Hanes or Fruit of the Loom. You can always exchange the shirt for a different size by sending it back. Returns are okay too.

Can I trust you with my credit card number?

All transactions are secure and your credit card info goes directly from the store to my credit card processor. I never see it. I have done test transactions with my own credit card and everything comes up kosher. Your statement will show “DCB STORE.” Paypal is also a payment option if you are paranoid.

How long will it take to get the shirt?

About a week from when you order (via USPS unless you choose UPS), but so you don’t hold that against me I will officially state two weeks. It will come in a poly mailer.

Why do I have to register?

Because of the software. I’m using Zen Cart and right now they do not allow the option of taking off registration. It had all the other features I needed so this was a compromise. As the privacy policy states, your info is kept private. Your credit card information is not stored.

Will you put this on womens cut shirts?

I’m thinking about it.

Will you print more if these sell out?

Most likely. I want to keep quantities low so I don’t have to maintain inventory.

What kind of reactions will I get from wearing this shirt?

In public places no one is going to say anything to you, but you will notice people looking. In bars or clubs people will do double takes and make comments. Most are in the vein of “Hah that’s funny/great.” Some people don’t even notice. Some girls say things like, “Oh I see.” I think it would be boring if you really tell people what the shirt means, so I just say that pump and dump refers to the stock market. I’m also going to try to say it’s about working out at the gym.

Will wearing this shirt increase or decrease my game?

That would be like asking, “Should I have long hair or short hair?” I’m confident I can wear a shirt that says “I’m gay” and still pull.

The first night I wore the shirt I spent a lot of time with a petite blond whose eye level was at the shirt’s text the entire time. The girls that want to bang won’t care what shirt you are wearing.

Can you ship to Canada or somewhere else?

Most likely. Email me and I will get you a quote.

More pics:

European male model (wearing size medium)

Store link: DCBstore.com.

61 thoughts on “I PUMP AND DUMP

  1. KassyK

    Yay…That pic was sccccary that was up and I appreciate the switch off. Thanks sugar…I’ll make it up to you soon :hump:

  2. V

    The shirt appeared to be a real turn on in person, the ladies were all “who is that hairy bad boy?” it can get awkward.

  3. virglekent


    I strongly applaud you on the marketing of your line of ?Oh so ironic? t shirts. You?re defiantly getting your hustle and flow on like we say in the streets. I do however frown upon your marketing campaign. You see your name is now associated with a brand and therefore associated with a certain lifestyle. With that said you can?t just offer this out to any and every Tom, Dick, and Harry. It should be targeted towards people who ?live? this lifestyle not just ?believe? in it. I?m trying to say if I catch one Peter Griffin looking fat fuck wearing a ?Pump and Dump? shirt, I?ll lose my shit. Because we both know the only thing he?s pumping and dumping is his left hand.

    More emphasis should have been placed on the type of man that sports the shirt, and how it should be sported. As a proud representative of the ?keep them hoes on their toes in 06? campaign, I?m down with the cause. Like the Polo black label or a fine Dolce and Gabbana tailored suit, this shirt isn?t for everyone. I just wanted you to be aware of the power of the ?oh so ironic T shirt? you?ve unleashed and to guide that power with the utmost care. With that said, I?ll be putting my own to cents in on a full post later.


  4. Raincouver

    Excellent DCB! Well done. That’s the entrepreneurial spirit that built America. Perhaps Circle V will wear the shirt on his millionairematch.com profile and start a trend to sweep the nation. “Excuse-me miss, are you down with the pump and dump? Yes? Well, hello then…”

  5. KassyK

    Nabeel–My hand was precisely where it should be….Protecting my hoo-ha. 😉

    You dont sit next to a friend wearing a “I Pump & Dump” tee while wasted and expect just pleasantries, now do you?

  6. DCB Post author

    VK: I don’t see this shirt as ironic. I can’t make it more straight-forward.

    I think we already know that it takes a special kind of man to sport this in public… one who can probably back it up. I doubt there are many beta nerds who will buy this shirt. They will feel uncomfortable wearing it.

  7. KassyK

    YAY! The stay puft pic is gone…I am actually about to do a little “I Pump & Dump” research on my own blog right now….

  8. hedonistic

    The visual appeal of the fuzzy DCB cancels out the offensiveness of the shirt. Bottom line is that women who are attracted to fur-bearing animals will only think “Aw, he doesn’t really MEAN it; he’s so cuuuuuuuuuute!!!!!!” And woe unto them . . .

  9. Jada

    DCB.. you look pretty nice in your new shirt. Didn’t know you could look so good……….even with the hairy arms and all. ” :amazed: “

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  11. Anonymous

    what a chump this guy is. dc women are retarded if theyre spreading for this dago aldo shoes wearing greaseball

  12. Datintize

    There was this guy see.
    He wasn’t very bright and he reached his adult life without ever having learned “the facts”.
    Somehow, it gets to be his wedding day.
    While he is walking down the isle, his father tugs his sleeve and says,

    “Son, when you get to the hotel room…Call me”

    Hours later he gets to the hotel room with his beautiful blushing bride and he calls his father,

    “Dad, we are the hotel, what do I do?”

    “O.K. Son, listen up, take off your clothes and get in the bed, then she should take off her clothes and get in the bed, if not help her. Then either way, ah, call me”

    A few moments later…

    “Dad we took off our clothes and we are in the bed, what do I do?”

    O.K. Son, listen up. Move real close to her and she should move real close to you, and then… Ah, call me.”

    A few moments later…


    “O.K. Son, Listen up, this is the most important part. Stick the long part of your body into the place where she goes to the bathroom.”

    A few moments later…

    “Dad, I’ve got my foot in the toilet, what do I do?”

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