If you think your chica would never tell a lie, guess again.
Chances are that she’s been telling you lie after lie since the beginning of your relationship. From white lies to black lies, most ladies do lie- straight to your face. Why would she lie to you? Well, one or two reasons … she does it to protect your feelings … or, to save her butt.
Here are some of the most popular lies that women tell men – from a gal that cares enough to lie the very best:
- “I love football.”
Yeah, right! As if I want to sit outside in the cold and watch a bunch of dudes running up and down a field, wearing black face paint and growling at each other … as they sweat like pigs.
- “I love you … just the way you are.”
Ha! As if! Come on, get real. As if you are perfect! Chances are that even if your lady loves you very much that she would also love it if you picked your towel up off the bathroom floor and actually hung it on that thing called a “towel rack.”
- “I love your friends.”
Whatever. They burp, they fart, they smell like beer. And, as if that was not enough … they flirt with me as soon as you turn your back.
- “I love your family.”
Hell, my own family drives me completely insane. What makes you think that yours is going to be any better?
- “I won’t get mad if you say my butt looks too big.”
You know how you like to spank my ass when we are f*cking? Oh, well … if you tell me my butt looks fat, it’s gonna be a long time, mister, before you get to see me bent-over-and-moaning-your-name again.
- “You’re right.”
If I am telling you that you are right about something … I am just trying to shut your big mouth up. You are never right. Ever.
- “It doesn’t bother me when you look at other women.”
Haaa. Yeah. That’s the best lie – eva! If you look at other women, that is like buying yourself a one-way ticket to the hell that is female rage. I am the only woman on this Earth, and, you only have eyes for me, damn it.
- “I don’t care how much money make.”
Best one yet! I am telling you … if your girl says this, she is playing you like a fool, buddy. I do not want a sugar daddy, but I do want a guy that is financially stable, independent and capable of providing for a potential future family.
- “Don’t worry honey, it happens to everyone.”
No, actually … it does not happen to everyone. And, when it does, there is this cute, little blue pill called Viagra.
- “Nothing’s wrong.”
If I say nothing’s wrong, you better watch yourself. “Nothing’s wrong” means something’s definitely wrong!
- “I swear, you’re my first.”
Haaaaa! Haa! Riiiiight! LMAO! ROFL!
Yes, we tell lies. But take it as a compliment. We are usually fibbing to protect your feelings … because we love you. :puke: