SWEET LITTLE LIES WOMEN TELL MEN

If you think your chica would never tell a lie, guess again.

Chances are that she’s been telling you lie after lie since the beginning of your relationship. From white lies to black lies, most ladies do lie- straight to your face. Why would she lie to you? Well, one or two reasons … she does it to protect your feelings … or, to save her butt.

Here are some of the most popular lies that women tell men – from a gal that cares enough to lie the very best:

  • “I love football.”
    Yeah, right! As if I want to sit outside in the cold and watch a bunch of dudes running up and down a field, wearing black face paint and growling at each other … as they sweat like pigs.
  • “I love you … just the way you are.”
    Ha! As if! Come on, get real. As if you are perfect! Chances are that even if your lady loves you very much that she would also love it if you picked your towel up off the bathroom floor and actually hung it on that thing called a “towel rack.”
  • “I love your friends.”
    Whatever. They burp, they fart, they smell like beer. And, as if that was not enough … they flirt with me as soon as you turn your back.
  • “I love your family.”
    Hell, my own family drives me completely insane. What makes you think that yours is going to be any better?
  • “I won’t get mad if you say my butt looks too big.”
    You know how you like to spank my ass when we are f*cking? Oh, well … if you tell me my butt looks fat, it’s gonna be a long time, mister, before you get to see me bent-over-and-moaning-your-name again.
  • “You’re right.”
    If I am telling you that you are right about something … I am just trying to shut your big mouth up. You are never right. Ever.
  • “It doesn’t bother me when you look at other women.”
    Haaa. Yeah. That’s the best lie – eva! If you look at other women, that is like buying yourself a one-way ticket to the hell that is female rage. I am the only woman on this Earth, and, you only have eyes for me, damn it.
  • “I don’t care how much money make.”
    Best one yet! I am telling you … if your girl says this, she is playing you like a fool, buddy. I do not want a sugar daddy, but I do want a guy that is financially stable, independent and capable of providing for a potential future family.
  • “Don’t worry honey, it happens to everyone.”
    No, actually … it does not happen to everyone. And, when it does, there is this cute, little blue pill called Viagra.
  • “Nothing’s wrong.”
    If I say nothing’s wrong, you better watch yourself. “Nothing’s wrong” means something’s definitely wrong!
  • “I swear, you’re my first.”
    Haaaaa! Haa! Riiiiight! LMAO! ROFL!

Yes, we tell lies. But take it as a compliment. We are usually fibbing to protect your feelings … because we love you. :puke:

24 thoughts on “SWEET LITTLE LIES WOMEN TELL MEN

  1. El Guapo

    Pregunta for you querida. Not that this is a problem for me, but what does it mean when a girl says that “size doesn’t matter”? Just wondering…. For my friend, entiendes?

    Mucho Amor,

    El Guapo

  2. Size Matters

    Size Matters– and if your woman says it doesn’t– she’s either lost her virginity to you– or she’s really attached to your personality and not into sex. Don’t be fooled. However, even if a guy isn’t that well-endowed- and he’s a super guy- women will overlook great sex for security- b/c we’re not that shallow.

    Circumference, not length is king..though length is an added bonus– but if there’s no cicumference, it feels like a gyno exam.

  3. CrazyGirl

    Agreed with Size Matters. Perhaps its shallow, but I would have a hard time staying with a guy with little circumference.

    MM – You forgot ‘it’s fine’. It kind of goes along with the ‘nothing’s wrong’ phrase. If you get any variant of fine such as ‘that’s fine’, ‘fine’, ‘fine, whatever’, well then it’s probably not fine.

  4. Miss Metropolis

    I thought about “size doesn’t matter” and “fine” …

    But, “size doesn’t matter,” small is “fine” with me.

    😀

  5. klo

    A lot of these are dysfunctional, passive-aggressive, manipulative, controlling and just plain cruel (and stupid) behaviors that are 1)totally disrespectful 2)the fast track to having a completely worthless relationship. I don’t think it’s funny or cutet to justify women being self-destructive.

  6. jessa j

    ugh again MM, all wrong

    KLO is 100% right.

    three snaps up and three snaps down…

    p.s. yes, girth is pretty much everything, anatomically speaking women don’t even have nerve endings past 3.5 inches into thier cervix. although, i wouldn’t want to fuck a chode either, the importance of length is pretty much all in our heads.

  7. elguapodc

    Gracias ladies. Just want to clarify that the question wasn’t for me. My girl Mercedes is always smiling. It was for my amigo Miguel. He says he’s a grower not a shower….

    Mucho Amor,

    El Guapo

  8. EAN

    ughhhhhhhh I believe you meant 3.5″ into the vagina… cuz 3.5 into the cervix.. ummm well that’s the uterus sweetheart…

  9. nabeel

    “ughhhhhhhh I believe you meant 3.5? into the vagina”

    EAN, you are correct. A cervix cannot be penetrated into by 3.5 inches – as that would probably be very painful for a woman. Why do yall think the cervix is there? It’s there for a reason, you know…

    jessa_j, you didn’t flunk sex ed did you? 😉

  10. nabeel

    Miss Metropolis, your post was harsh. But actually, you know what? It’s good that you posted this… I now am armed with bullshit detectors: so the next time women tells me those fibs, I will KNOW they are lying through their teeth!

    Metaphorically speaking, you just gave away top secrets about US Weapons to China. Thank you very much 🙂

  11. jenk

    any girl that says a guy having a long penis is important has never had sex with a man with a long penis. it’s PAINFUL. getting stabbed in the uterus is NOT FUN.

  12. big don

    As a guy,I’m average. I know I can stimulate my girlfriend but in the back of my mind worry about her going for someone bigger. I could live with it if she left me,but infidelity behind my back would be crushing. Thanks for your time,ladies.

  13. anna

    i think the guy’s technique matters a whole heck of a lot more than size. He could be huuuge and not know what to do with it to please me.

  14. Boo Boo

    All Guys are different, all girls are different, God made us the way he did for a reason. Different people like different things. There is no right or wrong answer here.

  15. jessej

    heh:

    I wish I had read these postings as a young guy.

    As a married guy I am constantly amazed at my wife’s ability to dance (girls lie, woman evade) around any number of her sensitive topics.

Comments are closed.