THE TEST

Make eye contact with a girl and hold it until she breaks first. DON’T BREAK EYE CONTACT FIRST. If she digs your vibe or look, she will think, “Hmmm what was that about,” and be intrigued. Some time later – before some other guy starts humping her leg – make eye contact again. If she holds it for longer than a second, she is open to the possibility of having sex with you, and will be receptive if you go up to her and say hi. This is like a pre-approach filter, so you don’t waste your energy talking to girls who probably won’t be into you. Don’t even bother making eye contact with girls – or anyone – if your appearance is grossly unpleasant to the eye.

32 thoughts on “THE TEST

  1. Kathryn

    For once, I completely agree with this. If I guy I found unattractive or uninteresting did this to me, I’d give him a pointedly disgusted look at least by the second time around.

    Solid advice.

  2. hanky

    very true

    but in general is there a time limit to how long you shoudl wait until you give her the 2nd stare

  3. Phil

    I simply walk up and say: I don’t know if you know, but I’m sort of a big deal. I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

  4. Chase

    I came here all ready to disagree with you (as usual)…but today you surprised me. I agree with you. I think this is the best way to approach some you are interested in. Just don’t forget to flash a great smile as well.

  5. Phil

    I’m a mess without you, I miss you so damn much. I wanna be near you. I miss your laugh! I miss…I miss your scent. I miss your musk….I think when this whole thing gets settled I think you and me should get an apartment together.

  6. Liz

    It’s called Sex Panther. It’s made from bits of real panther, so you know it’s good.

    (it smells like Bigfoot’s dick!!!)

  7. Liz

    I’m gonna take your mother Dorothy Mantooth out for a nice seafood dinner, and NEVER CALL HER AGAIN!!!

  8. Phil

    Ooohhh it’s a deep burn! I don’t know if you heard me counting. I did over a thousand. Tuesdays are arms and back.

  9. Phil

    I am a MAN who discovered the wheel and built the eiffel tower. With metal. And brawn. That’s what kind of man I am. You’re just a woman with a tiny brain. A brain that’s one third the size of ours. It’s science.

  10. Liz

    Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection!

    Ah…it’s an optical illusion, something with the pleats. I’m going to return them now to the pants store…

  11. Phil

    James, I’ve been meaning to tell you, you should probably lay low for a while…find a safehouse or something because you’re probably wanted for murder.

  12. Anonymous

    stopped biological:autodecrements unfamiliar scalars – Tons of interesdting stuff!!!

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