It seems that girls have rules for every dating act there is: how to speak to a man, show interest, accept dating offers, show affection, put out, etc. How did it get to this point? I believe many American women have a hard time acting genuine around men because they have modified their personalities with behavior they see in celebrities and television, and things they’ve read in pop psychology and relationship books, which combined is a powerful cultural force that your typical American girl can not ignore.
At some point in an American girls life, usually late in college or immediately after, there is one guy who demolishes her heart. He stomps on it while she watches, right before he starts making out with another girl. She liked him a lot but he didn’t reciprocate for whatever reason. Her friends – who have most likely never had a meaningful relationship in their lives – start giving her “advice” on how to hook guys in the future. Don’t seem desperate. Show less interest. Don’t call back right away. Don’t put out until the eighth date. She takes this advice seriously, and supplements it with The Rules readings and Sex and the City viewing marathons. She ends up worshipping a show that features old women who are absolute failures at having a fulfilling relationship, but who have the ever-so-useful skill of analyzing every minute behavior that a guy could possibly do.
Instead of accepting that rejection is a part of life – where you will get burned repeatedly – and forging ahead with a natural attitude, the American girl overcompensates and incorporates a ridiculous game that is just an elaborate defense mechanism against getting hurt. She turns herself from a vulnerable, real woman into a cold, aloof spinster who no guy could possibly take seriously. There is no reversing the corruption of the American female after this brainwashing, and she will forever be tainted in the eyes of an honest, genuine man.
The same man who would have found her normal self to be quite charming and relationship-worthy is extremely disturbed that this pretty girl plays the game so hard. Because there is no guy out there who wants to settle down with a girl who is usually “busy”, detached, and so easily influenced by fictional TV shows, he puts up with her cold gaming long enough to get that notch on his bedpost. How amusingly ironic that a girl who is scared of getting pumped and dumped takes on a game and attitude that causes guys to pump and dump her even more. It may take a lifetime for her to understand that most men simply want a cute girl who treats him well.
The American girl blazes through her 20’s spending all her money on clothes and alcohol, meeting guys at happy hours and bump n’ grind nights at the club. Each year her game gets “better” until the point where she can date multiple guys at once while being completely unhappy at the same time. Her 30’s arrive and the nagging from her mother to find a man can no longer be ignored. During the ensuing panic her guard lowers enough to deceive a desperate guy that she will actually make a good wife. The guy makes the biggest mistake of his life by marrying damaged goods, saying hello to a miserable suburban existence with a woman who is incapable of happiness, while saying goodbye to oral sex forever.