Category: Absurd


Interesting Dear Prudence letter:

I am a 21-year-old woman who married four months ago. I have been with my husband for six years and in that time grew to love him more and more each day. At this point, I couldn’t imagine my life without him. But he insists that we make love every day, and we have been doing that for years. I now regret that the passion I once had isn’t there. I feel like I am doing it just for him and don’t know how to approach him (it is a very sensitive situation).

The answer:

Suggest he pursue an exciting new career as a driller on an offshore oil rig. Or an astronaut on the International Space Station. On the surface, there’s nothing that unusual about a very young man with a willing sexual partner wanting to do it all the time. But there’s something in your account that smacks of compulsion?hasn’t he ever had a cold, been too tired from work or school, or just wanted to watch sports? … But if, in response to your request, he whines or bullies, then you need joint counseling?you can find referrals at the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists. (emphasis added)

Only in America would someone recommend a man go to counseling for wanting sex from his wife. Do you think when he got married he thought he’d face the prospect of infrequent sex while still in his early 20’s?


Until recently, I’d never gone out with a man who didn’t trust me (or who lived in a different city). Sure, I have a million friends and a hundred parties, but just because said friends/parties are usually at a bar doesn’t mean I’m tarted up and out trying to get with other dudes. If Europe has cafe society, the U.S. – and especially DC – has bar society where the primary goal is to unwind and meet your friends. I mean, the people on “Cheers” weren’t there to get laid.

There are some women who are okay with possessive and jealous guys, and there are some women who are equally if not more possessive and jealous. But I’m not either of those women. And I don’t like being pushed around and told how to act in a “serious relationship”, especially when I’m not doing anything to warrant it. I can be a really shitty person, but I’m loyal through and through – I’ve never cheated on a boyfriend or anything close to it.

If you have a problem trusting someone – like for example you ever call back a number on their “received calls” list or read their texts when they’re not around – and you have no legitimate reason not to trust that person, then you have a problem. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a personal issue, but maybe representative of a lack of confidence in the nature of the relationship. But not trusting someone isn’t a thing that can be easily reversed, if at all. Like V said, if you don’t have trust, you don’t have anything.


You know how you might have a celebrity crush on someone, and you totally join their fan forums and read all about them in Us Weekly, and think they’re so cool, and then you meet them in person, and they’re completely worthless?

I feel that way about Miss KAC.

I started reading her now-defunct DC Socialites blog shortly after I moved here last year. She seemed so fun, and awesome, and always doing cool stuff, and going to bars that I didn’t yet know existed. I checked out all of the links to other blogs (which is how I first came upon DCB), I wondered why Windy mysteriously vanished, and I got kinda bummed when the blog folded forever.

But after meeting her in person and seeing her, uh, “revamped” blog, I feel sorry that I even wasted my time.

First off, her blog is a piece of shit. “Ask KAC” and she will respond with obtuse, trying-to-be-flippant, Paula Abdul-on-painkillers answers. I’d rather eat glass. That incredible pile of feces was strike one.

Second, KAC must have the worst judgement in people. From what I hear, she hangs out with the most two-faced, execrable idiots imaginable which explains why none of her friendships ever seems to end well.

Third, I guess she has some kind of bodyguard because she’s gotten death threats or some such nonsense. Her blog makes me want to kill myself after reading it, not her. If she’s so worried about threats to her safety – and not, oh, some kind of bizarre head case – she should STOP BLOGGING. If you, dear readers, think I’m an uppity bitch, you should try coming to a blogger happy hour, where KAC will no doubt bring the world’s biggest douche as her date and then barricade herself in a corner and not even try to be friendly and then leave early to go to some “hot” other place… full of pretentious snoots like herself.

Finally, yeah, I did say her hair looked like troll dolls styled it, and I think anyone at that happy hour would be hard-pressed to deny it. But so what? I’ve had that and worse said about me (mostly in the comments section – thanks guys). I mean, WHO CARES? GROW UP! Isn’t she over 30? I guess her spinster-dom requires no explanation.

Look for a response on her blog, likely some form of ridiculous, devil-may-care deflection… accompanied by one of her trademark stock photos meant to suggest the utter fabulousness that she is terminally lacking.


Sweet Jessa got fired from one of her jobs. I’m not surprised that a conservative organization like The Academy of Natural Sciences let her go for blogging: they definitely don’t want their image corrupted by the only person who can actually make dino-bones appear interesting. I’m guessing it happened because a bored HR person googled the staff list. :boring:

Fine, she wrote too much and must face the consequence of losing her job. I doubt she cares too much about that. But then the Academy had to throw in some blackmail…

They told me that if I didn’t [delete my entire blog] that they would send my archived blog to the Aquarium where I also work, and if I ever listed them as a reference they would forward the content to any future employeers.

I think they are just trying to scare her. Google already caches everything and their threat of sharing the blog with a future employer sounds illegal to me. Now word on the street is they have backed off on the whole “take down your entire blog” thing, but Jessa needs to stay vigilant and confront them about the blackmail request and make sure it was just a “misunderstanding.”

I found the contact information of the HR person that probably fired her. I think it would be nice to let that woman know that there are a lot of people who find her behavior to be inappropriate. While it doesn’t look like it will get to that, I wouldn’t mind launching my next hater campaign against an HR person. My next job will be at a company that does not have an HR department.

Even though I don’t blog from or about work, I’m probably next. :shudder:

– Metafilter: This blog will self destruct in less than twelve hours
The story according to Jessa


It’s very upsetting to me when I see an alpha man get domesticated by a woman. I had to gather up a lot of strength to detail the ugly fall to beta that you are about to read. Ladies and gentleman, I present the case study of A Unique Alias.

Proof of alpha:

1. Would hate on me with impunity. Got banned several times but used proxy servers to visit. Kept coming back for more punishment.
2. Would show up in happy hours with a Hanes t-shirt purchased at Sears. Smoked cigarettes in public like it was already illegal. Did not care about his appearance.
3. Posted edgy content, such as ((insert edgy content link here!!)).

But then he met Rhinestone Cowgirl at a blogger happy hour. Gradually, he went soft like a 30 year old woman’s body. His hate just faded away, to the point where we were friendly to each other and corresponded through email. Then it just got ugly with public blog displays of affection (read the first comment) and postings polluted with love. The announcement that he was moving in with RC after four months was shocking, but nowhere near as bad as… posting of poetry. Sorry but no real alpha would be caught dead with that shit. His transformation to beta was sealed. The final step for the new beta is to quit all his hobbies and give his soul to his future American bride.

One week after Valentine’s Day, he abruptly quit his blog. :whoa:

Either the beta was always inside him and it took regular sex to get it out, or it was the evil dedication of an American woman to suck the alpha out. We’ll never know, but allow me to connect the dots for you people:

1. I co-host the blogger happy hour at Dragonfly.
2. AUA meets future girlfriend at the same happy hour.
3. Girlfriend turns AUA into a beta.

Therefore, I turned AUA into a beta male. Hate on me and one day you too may be pussy whipped into a very public relationship. Life works in ironic ways.

Oddly enough, I still have not received my “Thank you for changing our lives forever” card.


I’ve been having a hard time adjusting since my return because of the ugliness that is the United States.

Venezuela: Miss Universe
United States: Cranes to lift fat people out of their homes.

Plus, I’ve been wronged twice since I’ve been back:

1. As a frequent visitor to Dragonfly, I’m often able to go straight upstairs to the pseudo-exclusive area (not really much of an accomplishment). But on Friday night, my friend and I were refused entry by a bouncer that definitely knows me. His explanation was that I needed more girls. The point of going to a particular bar many times is so you don’t get treated like some average shlub. This was major disrespect. I am boycotting Dragonfly for at least one year.

2. I went to Taco Bell yesterday to enjoy a Grilled Stuft Burrito, when I noticed hours later that the food hadn’t moved from my stomach. Twelve hours later and I’m puking my guts out. I learned the hard way that when you have long hair, you must pull your hair back or you will get puke in it. I don’t know what is worse, puke in hair, or having puke in your nose so you can savor the smell for many hours later. I am boycotting Taco Bell for eternity. Once my insides stop trying to violently escape my body, I will have some good stuff to start the year. Now excuse me while I go make love to my toilet.